A Cheeky Guide to Romantic and Naughty Limits in LDS Dating.
Picture this: you’re a young, starry-eyed Latter-day Saint (LDS), navigating the wild waters of love, lust, and the law of chastity. The air’s thick with tension—hormones are raging, and the temple wedding feels light-years away. You’re wondering: What can I get away with before marriage without crossing that sacred line? In modern Mormonism, the rules around premarital intimacy are famously strict, but the gray areas? Oh, honey, they’re where the real intrigue lives. From sweet hand-holding to whispered loopholes like “soaking,” we’re diving into what’s technically permitted, what’s romantic, and what’s downright naughty. Buckle up, because this 1000-word romp through LDS dating do’s and don’ts is about to get spicy.
The Law of Chastity: The Ultimate Vibe Check
Let’s set the scene. In The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (aka Mormonism), the law of chastity is the golden rule of romance. It’s all about keeping things “morally clean” until you’re sealed in the temple—or at least legally hitched in a hetero marriage the church recognizes. No sex before marriage, no pornography, no heavy petting, and definitely no solo play (yep, masturbation’s off the table). Church leaders, from prophets to bishops, have been crystal clear: sexual relations are sacred, reserved for husband and wife, and anything that “arouses sexual feelings” outside that bond is a no-go. Think of it as a cosmic boundary—divinely drawn but humanly tested.
So, what can you do when the sparks are flying, and you’re still months (or years) from the altar? The official handbook keeps it vague, leaving room for interpretation—and, let’s be real, a little creativity. Here’s the lowdown on what’s technically permitted, with a wink to what’s sweet and what’s sneaky.
Hand-Holding: The Romantic Classic
First up, the OG of LDS-approved affection: hand-holding. It’s simple, it’s sweet, and it’s totally within bounds. Imagine strolling through a Miami sunset, fingers laced, the ocean breeze teasing your hair—pure romance, no sin in sight. Church leaders don’t bat an eye at this; it’s the safest way to say, “I’m into you,” without risking a bishop’s lecture. Pair it with a lingering gaze, and you’ve got a Hallmark moment that’s 100% chastity-compliant. It’s the kind of move that builds anticipation, making that eventual wedding kiss feel like fireworks.
Hugging: Short, Sweet, and Sometimes Steamy
Next, we’ve got hugs. The guidance here is “brief and modest”—think a quick squeeze after a date, not a full-on bear hug that lingers too long. A short embrace at the door after a night of deep talks? Romantic as heck, and it keeps things in the green zone. But let’s be honest: if you’re pressed chest-to-chest, feeling that heartbeat, it can edge into naughty territory fast. The line’s blurry—church pamphlets don’t define “brief,” so it’s up to you to keep it PG. Too much heat, and you might tempt fate (or a confession).
Kissing: The Slippery Slope of Smooches
Now, kissing—here’s where it gets juicy. Officially, light pecks are fine; think a soft goodnight kiss that says, “You’re my person.” It’s romantic, tender, and a staple of LDS dating lore. But the church draws a hard line at “passionate kissing”—the kind with tongues tangling and hands wandering. Leaders like Spencer W. Kimball have warned against prolonged lip-locks that stoke “sexual emotions,” calling them a gateway to sin. A quick smooch under the stars? Adorably permitted. A makeout sesh in the back of a car? Naughty—and risky if you’re aiming for temple recommend status. The vibe shift happens when intent does—keep it chaste, and you’re golden.
Cuddling: Cozy or Controversial?
Cuddling’s a gray area that’ll raise eyebrows depending on who’s watching. Sitting close on a couch, arms around each other, watching a sunset? That’s romantic, low-key, and technically okay if you’re not horizontal. But spooning or lying down together—clothed or not—crosses into “arousing” territory, which the church explicitly nixes. It’s naughty when it mimics intimacy too closely; bishops might call it “lying on top of” someone, even if it’s just Netflix and chill. Stick to upright snuggles, and you’ve got a sweet, permitted moment—stretch it too far, and you’re playing with fire.
The Infamous “Soaking”: Naughty Loophole or Urban Myth?
Okay, let’s talk about the elephant in the room: soaking. Rumor has it some LDS folks—especially college kids—think they’ve cracked the chastity code by inserting without thrusting. The logic? No movement, no sin. It’s pure naughtiness dressed up as a technicality, and it’s blown up online (hello, TikTok circa 2021). But here’s the tea: there’s zero evidence the church endorses this. Experts like ex-Mormon TikTokers say it’s a desperate workaround for hormone-crazed youth, not a sanctioned act. Romantic? Not really—it’s more clinical than cuddly. Naughty? Absolutely, and if a bishop catches wind, you’re toast. Most call it a myth, but the whispers persist.
“Jump Humping”: The Next-Level Naughty Hack
If soaking’s wild, “jump humping” is next-level. Allegedly, a third party bounces the bed while a couple soaks, simulating sex without the couple moving. It’s the naughtiest loophole yet—straight out of a sitcom plot—and it’s about as romantic as a tax audit. No official LDS doctrine blesses this absurdity; it’s a fringe tale from Utah’s rumor mill. Experts like Debbie, an ex-Mormon podcaster, confirm it’s rare but real for some. If you’re tempted, know this: it’s a one-way ticket to disciplinary council, not a clever cheat code.
Flirty Banter: Words That Tease Without Crossing
Words can be weapons of romance, and flirty talk is totally permitted if you keep it clean. Whispering sweet nothings—“You look amazing tonight”—is swoon-worthy and safe. It’s romantic when it builds connection without veering into sexting territory. But if you’re dropping innuendos about what’s under that modest skirt, it’s naughty and against the “pure thoughts” rule. Keep it playful, not provocative, and you’ve got a green light to charm.
Dancing: Twirl Into Romance (But Keep It Tame)
Dancing’s a go—think a slow sway at a church event, hands on waist, eyes locked. It’s romantic, flirty, and fine as long as it’s not grinding or “overtly sexual” (per church youth guides). A twirl under Miami’s neon lights? Yes, please. Bump-and-grind at a club? Naughty and off-limits. The line’s in the intent—keep it classy, and you’re swaying within bounds.
The Vibe: Romance vs. Naughty in LDS Land
So, what’s the takeaway? Permitted acts lean romantic—hand-holding, quick hugs, soft kisses, and innocent cuddles build love without breaking vows. They’re the slow-burn stuff that makes waiting feel worth it. Naughty creeps in when you push boundaries—passionate makeouts, sneaky loopholes like soaking, or anything that “arouses” too much. The church’s stance is firm: if it feels like sex (or a workaround), it’s out. But the lack of a detailed rulebook leaves wiggle room—and that’s where the fun (and tension) lies.
Navigating the Heat: Tips for LDS Lovers
- Set Your Line: Chat with your boo about what feels right—maybe kissing’s your limit, maybe it’s just hands. Agreeing keeps it chill.
- Cool the Jets: Tempted to go further? Step back, breathe, pray if that’s your jam—self-control’s the name of the game.
- Bishop Roulette: If you slip, your bishop’s reaction could range from “say a prayer” to “see you in council.” Know the stakes.
- Lean Romantic: Focus on the sweet stuff—dates, talks, little touches. It’s hotter when it’s holy, trust us.
The Final Word: Sacred, Sexy, and Waiting
In modern Mormonism, premarital sex acts are a tightrope walk between divine rules and human desire. Stick to the romantic—those tender, permitted moments—and you’re golden. Flirt with the naughty, and you’re rolling the dice on your spiritual status. Whether it’s a chaste peck or a whispered “not yet,” the journey’s about building something epic for later. So, LDS babes, keep it flirty, keep it fun, and save the real fireworks for the wedding night. Miami’s heat can wait—your eternal love story’s worth it.
